Do you have a picky eater? 5 mistakes you could be making

The Toddler Edition

Picking eating has become a prevalent first world problem. Generations ago, our ancestors didn’t have the privilege of super grocery stores and fast food, so dinner time wasn’t a menu of options, it was just dinner time. Back then, the only options were eating or staying hungry. Nowadays, the approach to eating has evolved so it isn’t surprising to see how challenging it has become raising kids who are “good eaters”. Don’t worry, it’s not just you.

One of the most common topics I get asked about is picky eating. It can (and does) affect children of all ages. There is so much content to cover with regards to picky eaters that I’m going to split it up into different age groups.

Let’s talk about toddlers first because they are the true terrorists of the household, and this is arguably the most challenging phase of parenting. It’s true: having a toddler is tough. In my opinion, it’s harder than having a newborn. But it’s just a phase, and it too shall pass.

I want to get one thing out of the way right off the bat : while some people are lucky enough to have kids who are good eaters from infancy (typically the same people who had easy labors and had their babies sleeping through the night at 2 months of age, ahem), most people have major challenges when it comes to raising good eaters. This is normal.

And more importantly: this is a FULL. TIME. Commitment.

Don’t give up.

Your kids are going to be stubborn. They are going to stress you out over food. (But you were already stressed out over their poop so you’re used to it by now). They are going to have set-backs (hello all grandparents!). They are going to frustrate you. And you’re going to want to throw in the towel because you’re tired and that’s easier on everyone.

But don’t.

Parenting is a commitment and raising good eaters is just part of that commitment. It’s a long road, but it’s worth it. Eating well is a building block of life. Learning to like fruits and vegetables, while avoiding sugar and junk food, is essential to a long life. And who doesn’t want their kids to be healthy? Nobody.  

Raising kids to eat healthy involves talking, more talking, encouraging, educating and setting a good example for your kids. I know we’ve all secretly shoved an entire sleeve of oreos into our mouths while nobody was looking, but the truth is, if we don’t want our kids to ask for cookies every five minutes, it’s best not to have them available at all. Out of sight, really is out of mind.  So the reverse holds true too: put the food you want your children to eat in front of them. All the time. Even if you don’t think they will eat it. They need to see it. They need to acknowledge it as a part of their life. They need to play with it, taste it, spit it out, chew it, suck the flavor out, and they need to feed it to you.

In general, the rule of thumb for toddlers is this: YOU DECIDE WHAT YOUR TODDLER EATS, AND THEY DECIDE HOW MUCH.

Here are 5 mistakes parents commonly make when feeding their toddlers

1- They misinterpret portion sizes

Toddlers don’t eat nearly as much as babies do. If you look at the growth chart, you’ll notice their weight gain slows during toddlerhood and because of this, they don’t need as many calories as they used to. Parents often misinterpret this for picky eating, when often times, it’s just “normal toddler eating”. It is not atypical for a toddler to eat a handful of tablespoons of food per meal and become full.  If your pediatrician is happy with your toddler’s growth, then don’t stress too much about their portion size if they are eating and tasting things on their plate

2. They let them snack all day

This is a big one. Many toddlers are walking around with free access to sippy cups, cheerios, fruit snacks and goldfish crackers. This may not leave much room for eating meals, so try really hard to offer them 3 good meals a day, with 2 small snacks. If possible, keep the snacks to healthy whole foods like fruits and vegetables or nuts.

3. They panic if they skip a meal

This is where many parents get in trouble. Their toddlers out-stubborn them. Parents worry about their kids when they haven’t eaten two good meals and then offer them what they KNOW will be eaten. This is a slippery slope because this put the child at risk for ONLY liking those things and holding out for them. If your child is growing well , try not to worry if they haven’t eaten well for a day or two. Chances are, they will eat double on that third day! That’s how toddlers eat. They don’t eat and then they act like they are starving.

4. They let them drink their calories

By the time babies turn into toddlers, they should be drinking 2 cups of milk (or a milk substitute) per day, and water for the rest of the day. Any more than that, and they won’t have as much room for real food.

5. They don’t set a good example

In general, meal times should be a family event. Have you ever wondered why kids eat better in daycare settings? It’s because they are sitting and watching other kids eat their food. Try to do the same thing at home. Sit down, serve your food at the table and turn off all screens. Help your toddler with their food, while you eat your own food and rave at how delicious that broccoli really is. You are your child’s biggest influence; this is your chance to put this to good use!

Overall, picky eating is a right of passage into toddler-hood. If you try your best and consult regularly with your pediatrician, you will find things are a lot easier when your children are older.  Bottom line: you’re doing a great job and if it’s important to you, (and I know it is), it’s worth the headache.

Ps. The above post is my opinion and should not replace the advice of your doctor! Not liable…not liable….not liable……..

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